Sunday, January 15, 2012

leaving Adelaide

tik tok tik tok tik tok...,

nggak nyangka waktu berjalan cepet banget.. it has been 1,5 years, adelaide and me become a good friends, many things happen which couldn't describe by an essay. It was wonderfull!
dimana ak oleh bertemu teman teman baru, menamah banyk pengalaman, dan yang pasti mencapai satu perubahan dengan prosess yang nggak gampang.
Adelaide been treated me really well.
and now it's time for me to say Goodbye.
the are a tie that makes me couldn't let go Adelaide, from people who lives here and still hard to let me g (Bu As and Om Bob), but show must go on, I will leave all the memories in Adelaide, with fully gratitude back to Indonesia.
am I sad or happy? couldn't really tell the feeling.
I'm a realistic person, living in the present and future, never look to the past, so what I know is I need to move on and continue my life.
this is not the end of God's promises.. this is the begining.
The things which makes lighten my burden to let go Adelaide is, all my friends in Indonesia
there is nothing to stop me to meet them soon. esspecially Joko... I can't wait to see him!!
and more important thigs, I'm going bcak with my love ones, Dion will meet my mom, and he is the firs boyfriend who i introduced to family... He will going back with me to Indonesia...
really nothing to stop me.

Eventhough future seems so blur, but i belive When you focus on possibilities, you will have more opportunities. thats what I belive will happen to me
I have more than a plan in Indonesia, I have courage that I will gain something more there, the challage is begin soon. 
and God made me ready :)

Thursday, January 12, 2012

berteman dengan mama

seperti kebanyakan anak muda, i have a big problem communicate with my parents,
specifically, My mom.
bukan hanya karena kita jarang kumpul, tapi juga karena sikap dan kepribadiannya yang unik.
mama orangnya biasa sendiri, karena dia ank tunggal, nggak merasa butuh orang lain dan sangat perfectsionist, gaya bicaranya yang keras dan kelakuannya yg sekarepe dhewe sering membuat aku snewen, she doesn't look like an ordinary mom who usually people have.
kalo biasanya mama dateng pasti dimasakin, semua mua bersih, dan rapi. tapi kalo mamaku dateng, barang semua ilang pindah nggak tau kemana, alat2 rumah tangga rusak semua, dan alamat aku tiap sore harus masak buat makan malem... cape deee.
namun beliau juga punya talenta, she can speak 10 hours without stop! it's like a radio broadcast, or worst than that.. if you don't stop her, she can go all night long :S
sejak kecil, mama nggak pernah ngurusin anak2nya like ordinary mom, yang dia lakukan adalah menggaji orang untuk ngurusin anaknya dan mencukupi kebutuhan, yah mungkin bisa dimaklumi karena mama single parents dan berjuang demi mencukupi ketiga anaknya yang masih sekolah, namun beliau bukan saja berhasil mencukpi, malah sedikit lebih mewah.
but for me still, somehow I can't really stand if she is around, auranya itu udah ngajak orang berantem, plus ndak membuat orang simpati, tiap kali dia ngomong, pengen aku jawab dengan kenceng dan kasar.
as the time goes by,, i feel tired.
tired to fight, tired to get angry, tired to speak loud, tired to hate her.
so I started to make a peace with her. I'm not trying to love her.. just start to like her, as a friend.
it went well on the first, I'm trying to be nice with her, like i treated my friend. a bit informal, and most is trying not to shout at her which is quite hard.
I;m trying to help her, and somehow if i don't like it, i tell her honestly that don't want to do it. obviously I joke around with her and make fun of her.
spent more time as a family, trveling it's really a good treatment. kata orang jowo "witting tresna, jalaran soko kulino" , kita mencintai karena kita terbiasa... terbiasa bersama, terbiasa dengan kehadiran orang tersebut, jadi kita lebih tau apa yang dia inginkan dan menyesuaikan dengan dirikita. hasilnya? mmm tamapaknya memuaskan.
sampai detik ini aku berusaha jadi teman mama, atleast meskipun kami nggak affectoinate banget, ato sampe ngomong heart to heart, but we get along quite well.

thanks God for that :)

Monday, January 2, 2012

2012? Time for new resolutions

Christmas has been passed, and I am in the year of 2012.
I'm spending time with my family, many things happen recently, and I believe it's for our own good. plety of funny stories from my mom's whose trying to be "mom" and turned it as a disaster. L.O.L
anyway, this kind of boring new year, i spent in bu Asanah's house beause I was SICK!, high fever, cold, but good thing is I spent the last seconds of 2011 and the first second of 2012 with people that i love the most, and love me more, not strangers, not someone who I choose to be. I was in the phone with my boyfriend which 2,5 hours different
one thing that unbelieveable with this new year is I'm not alone anymore, I have a boyfriend, eventhough just on the phone, but his presence is here :) hope we could spend next new year together sayang :)

it's going to be a tough year for me, ever since I need to going back to Indonesia and find a job, harder because my relationship in uncertainty, as always... if we can go far, really it's because God's grace, and really it's God's plan...untill now I can really feel what happen with us is really God's plan. I will never insist or resist anything, because this is one miracle who happen in my life..  I'm gonna fight for it.

So my 2012 resolution going to be many things; and most of it connecting to my future in Indonesia. trying to get it in details..

  1. driving skills ;I'm not going to go out to work BEFORE I know how to drive a car, till I got lisence! ok that's going to be hard, but I want to be independent
  2. trying harder ; I promise to get jobs exclude my mom's bussiness, and I'm not going to complain about anything, just accept the situation, trying to survive, and figure out how to be master on it, include my service in the place that God will put me, get the balance on it. achieve something, moving around for experience, as well as saving more money.
  3. maintaining; im going to be seriously maintaining my body  -in detail - I'm going to regulary work out, go to skin care, and do products to maintain my performance. it's gonna be tough as well because I'm not use to it anymore when I'm in australia
  4. I'm going to hold on my relationship.. go ALL IN, in the way that If I'm going to help Dion, I'm not going to be like you is your problem, not my problem. but I will going like your problem is my problem, something wrong with you, is something wrong with me as well. trying to build trust and faith on each other, plus support in God's faith. even though I need to be long distance with him *again

yeah that's pretty much 4 point that I want to achieve in 2012, and hopefully everything going well