Saturday, January 26, 2013

in my space

when i lay down in my room, im thinking how comfort this place
everything that i need is here, when i want something there always people served, and if there was something wrong, mama ready to taking care of it.
but why i feel uncomfortable, stuck, and pressured?
when all that I need is fulfilled, supposedly everything is good. but i don't think this is good...?
even though the job that has given to me is quite challenging , especially the system need to be upgrade,
but i feel has no sense of belonging here
only mom who asked me to stay, because of her age.. she deserves retirement
if this is the process for me to love this job, when this is going to end?
a year has been passed, and im not yet passed the test, this is getting worst
or maybe its just my feeling, after all past 7 years i've been away from home, now i need to accept the truth..
but till when?
I'm stuck... not growing...
lost my humility, lost my feeling of sincerely
but the vision still strong, I want to have my own business and not tied by the moral duty.
going that way, I'm still not sure as well..
resolution is never enough.. i need revolution.

God, answer me...what do you want me to do in my life?

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